On the Edge of Insanity
by Alexis Kingsley
Summary: Canada has always been ignored, lost, forgotten. But the stress is finally getting to him. As he is about to snap, his unlikely saviour shows up. Will he be able to ward away the insanity threatening the safety of the world?


He was close to snapping. He knew it, and he knew that if anyone around him noticed him, they would know too. He had come close to snapping before, but he had contained it in fear. He didn't want to hurt his family and friends, but pushing away the violent images and ideas was getting hard. No one noticed him, no matter how hard he tried to stand out. And he was sick of it.

He clenched his fists, nails digging into his palms. He came out of his reverie to notice that the loud arguing had escalated. Sighing, he looked around and found the causes of the disturbance-England and France were fighting while America and Prussia were arguing about who was more awesome.

He couldn't take it anymore. He wanted to beat every one of their faces in right that moment. He felt the carefully placed walls start to crumble. Those walls held back insanity, murderous rage. He would kill everyone in his path, including his family, if those walls broke.

Someone put a firm hand on his shoulder suddenly. He squeaked in surprise and turned to see Russia standing over him. Rage long forgotten, he was now completely terrified. He knew that Russia could see the fear, and fast receding rage, in his eyes. Russia chuckled, confirming that he knew Canada was scared. He took his hand off of Canada's shoulder, sitting down heavily in the chair beside him.

"So now..." Russia said, looking Canada in the eyes, "why is it that you look like you are ready to kill everyone?"

The question caught him off guard, and his eyes widened slightly, his jaw dropping a few centimeters. "You...you actually noticed me?" He said with a hopeful voice. One of the reasons he was close to snapping was that no one noticed or seemed to care about him or what he felt.

Russia nodded. "You looked like you were about to murder everyone," he pressed quietly, "care to explain why?"

Within a moment, he felt ecstatic, uncertain, and then an unimaginable rage bubble within him. "I don't see why I should talk to someone as intimidating as you about problems that aren't your own." he said, crossing his arms and observing the meeting room again. As soon as he said it, he knew Russia would get angry.

He had been expecting intimidation, certainly not a silent Russia. He turned back slowly to look at him staring into his own set of violet eyes, deep sadness and worry in his own. Canada was shocked into silence. The Russia everyone knew was never sad. He was strong and powerful. The Russia before him now didn't look like the familiar threatening man.

"I know you feel alone. The only reason I'm here talking to you is that I know the feeling." Sudden rage flashed in his eyes, drawing a slight whimper from Canada. "If you don't want to accept my help, I will not be the one to stop you from killing these idiots."

Canada stared wide eyed at Russia. It wasn't the fact that he knew what he felt like, everyone knew that Russia was fairly lonely. It wasn't that he didn't care whether he killed everyone or not. It was the fact that he was offering to help him that made Canada speechless, made him stare into his violent purple eyes with wonder.

"I...I don't want to kill anyone" Canada said in a whisper, dropping his head. It wasn't exactly a lie, but it wasn't the truth either. A part of his mind told him to kill everyone. Another part of his mind to just be complacent as usual. His mind was at war with itself-and it was tearing Canada apart. He knew he couldn't last long, but for the sake of his family, he would fight the insanity desperate to escape.

Russia nodded solemnly, glancing around. No one else in the room seemed to have noticed their conversation. "Do you think you can last the meeting without killing anyone?" Russia asked quietly.

Canada was uncertain. Just a minute ago, he had been close to killing everyone. "I don't know. I was really close to snapping before. But I can try." Canada's eyes flashed with courage. He could, and he would stop himself from snapping. Even if the only way to do so was to die.

After the meeting, Canada stood idly at the side of the room. Russia had gone back to his seat after he was sure that Canada was ok, and Germany had called order soon after that. The meeting had been as hectic as usual, nations arguing back and forth over useless topics. It was no wonder why Canada wished to go on a murderous spree.

The more Russia thought about it, the more realistic it seemed. Who wouldn't snap after constantly being ignored? He himself was on the edge of insanity. He faced similar problems to Canada. They were both isolated and lonely, Canada ignored and Russia terrifying. They were both solitary nations, alone against the world.

Canada wasn't the only one who needed to be kept sane. Helping was just Russia's excuse to be around someone other than his sisters. He hated to use the boy, but it had to be done.

Canada walked over to Russia warily, glancing around. The other nations had already left, leaving the 2 of them alone. He could tell that Canada was nervous. He was shaking almost imperceptibly as he walked over. Russia smiled softly, amused by the nation's obvious weakness. He wasn't used to much socialization himself, however Canada was obviously nervous.

"Hello Matvey." He smiled. He wasn't trying to intimidate Canada, but he flinched anyways. An almost inaudible squeak came from the nation's lips. Russia stood, walking to Canada. Up close, he could tell that his eyes were tinged with the look of an insane person, dark circles underlining them.

"You have let this get too far," he said with a frown. "How long have you been thinking like this?" If it had been going on for over a month, he would have to commend the boy on his bravery. Not many people could last long on the edge of insanity.

Canada looked down, mumbling, "A few years." Russia blinked, shocked. A few years was impressive. He had never met someone besides himself who could stay sane that long. "That is truly impressive, da? I have not met another who has managed to stay sane for so long."

"When you say another, are you saying that you are almost-"His voice caught, and he coughed once. "Insane?"

"Da, I suppose you could say that," He smiled, "which is why I may be the only one able to help you."

Canada's eyes narrowed slightly, and he said, "I will take whatever help I can get. How exactly do you plan to help me?" Russia chuckled. No one had ever been willing to accept help from him.

"This is very surreal, da? It seems that one must be driven to insanity to accept help from me. Have you heard that," He stood slowly, "being ignored triggers a reaction in your brain similar to physical pain?" He stepped forward, playing with a strand of Canada's hair, twisting it between his fingers. He flinched; his hands balled up into fists, staring down at the floor. "I would not want for you to be in pain." He stepped back, sitting again. "Therefore, I will make sure you are not ignored any longer." He smiled again, crossing his arms.

"You may leave if you wish now; I do not have much else to say." Canada looked up quickly, then fled the room, picking up his polar bear on the way. Russia blinked. "Were those…tears?" He said to the empty room.


End file.
